InTune

I have another person in my head. She talks to me and tells me what the right thing to do is. She takes my hand and walks me through my despair and sorrows. She wipes my tears and calms my shaking shoulders. She is calm and graceful but stern. Sometimes she’ll scold me for saying something or she’ll just nod her head as if she understands and let’s me go on my way.

When I hear a creak and I’m hiding under my blanket, my whole body shaking and my heart not slowing down I can’t hear her. There’s a screaming in my head and I can’t calm down. I can’t breath, I can’t move, I can’t speak, I can’t do anything and it’s petrifying. And then an hour later I can feel my heart calm down and I hear her soft voice telling me to peek my head out of my covers and I do. There’s nothing there. No monster or person. It’s just me in my bedroom and it’s dark. And I feel a warmth wrap around me and I know she’s cradling me. I knowing she’s rocking me to sleep. So, I let my eyes close and I let my fears vanish. I’m safe as long as I’m in her arms and I never plan on leaving them.